What Is Grounding and How Can It Help After Trauma?

Photo by Isabell Winter, downloaded from Unsplash on 9/22/24

Updated March 31, 2025

If you’ve ever found yourself overwhelmed, triggered, or stuck in painful memories, grounding might be exactly what you need. Trauma has a way of pulling us out of the present moment and throwing us back into fear, stress, or old roles we thought we left behind. Grounding is a practical, accessible skill that helps you return to the here and now—and for LGBTQ+ folks navigating trauma, especially from identity-based rejection or religious shame, it can be a game-changer.

My name is Eric Hovis, and I specialize in LGBTQ Therapy in NYC, with a focus on anxiety and complex trauma. I integrate EMDR, Internal Family Systems, and experiential methods to help people not just manage trauma, but actually heal it. Grounding is one of the foundational skills I use with nearly every client I work with. But I don’t believe in cookie-cutter advice—what matters most is discovering what actually helps you feel safe, steady, and present in your body again.

What Is Grounding, Really?

Grounding is any technique that helps you reconnect with the present moment. It's what helps you "wake up from the trance" that trauma can put you in. You might be spiraling in anxious thoughts, flooded by emotion, or completely numb. Grounding interrupts that spiral and reorients you to the now. It's a way of saying to your body: I'm here. I'm alive. I'm safe enough.

This isn’t about perfection or forcing yourself to be calm. It’s about noticing you’re offline—caught in fear, shame, or overwhelm—and choosing to come back to yourself. From there, other tools can work more effectively. But first, you have to be here.

For me personally, I’ve had moments in life where I could feel my anxious body revving like an engine—heart pounding, stomach in knots, thoughts racing. Grounding became the invitation to pause and touch something steadier, quieter. It helped me return to the moment and remember I wasn’t in danger anymore.

Why Trauma Makes Grounding Necessary

Trauma doesn’t just live in memory—it lives in the body. It keeps the nervous system stuck in survival mode, making it hard to distinguish past from present. You might intellectually know you’re not under threat, but your body hasn't gotten the memo.

LGBTQ+ individuals often experience trauma tied to identity: rejection, discrimination, or subtle daily invalidations that chip away at safety. For those raised in non-affirming religious settings, it gets even more complex. Safety was often equated with obedience, not authenticity. Grounding, then, isn’t just a coping skill—it’s a radical act of reclaiming your body, your presence, and your right to be here.

The Deeper Meaning of Grounding in LGBTQ+ Trauma Recovery

For many queer folks, especially those from fundamentalist backgrounds, the body was never seen as safe. You may have learned that comfort or soothing had to come from outside sources: prayer, performance, people-pleasing. Your own internal cues may have been invalidated or even demonized.

So when I work with LGBTQ+ clients in NYC, grounding becomes more than a stress-relief tool. It becomes the first step back to Self. In EMDR or experiential work, we identify a practice that genuinely helps you feel connected to the present. Something that functions like an anchor.

I often use the metaphor of touching grass—literally or symbolically. There's something powerful about reconnecting with the earth, something that says: I'm real. I'm here. The waves may be wild, but I’m anchored.

Grounding Techniques That Actually Work

Everyone's nervous system is different, so finding what works for you is key. Here are some grounding practices I often explore with clients:

1. Sensory Grounding

The classic 5-4-3-2-1 technique:

• 5 things you can see

• 4 things you can touch

• 3 things you can hear

• 2 things you can smell

• 1 thing you can taste

This draws attention away from distressing thoughts and toward the physical world. I often recommend holding something textured like a stone or piece of fabric to reinforce this sensory pull into the present.

2. Movement-Based Grounding

Simple physical movements can work wonders:

• Plant your feet and wiggle your toes

• Squeeze your hands into fists and release

• Do a slow, mindful stretch

These actions bring awareness back to your body and help discharge nervous energy.

3. Breathwork

Try box breathing:

• Inhale for 4 counts

• Hold for 4

• Exhale for 4

• Hold for 4

Breath is a built-in anchor. It’s always available, and focusing on it gives your nervous system a clear signal to slow down.

4. Visualization

Imagine a safe place, or a figure (real or imagined) who brings comfort. Whether it’s a beach, a forest, or a wise mentor, visualization creates internal distance from distress.

5. Orientation Technique

Photo by Brigitte Tohm, downloaded from Unsplash on 9/22/24

Reconnect with where and when you are: “It’s [time and date]. I’m sitting on the couch in my apartment, in [City]. I’m in [State], in [Country]. I’m safe right now.”

This works especially well during flashbacks or moments of disassociation.

What Sets My Approach Apart

In my NYC-based LGBTQ+ therapy practice, I don’t just throw grounding techniques at clients and hope they stick. We co-create a personalized toolkit rooted in your actual life and nervous system. My goal is to help you discover a grounding practice that doesn’t just "work" but helps you feel like you again.

And here’s where it gets even more meaningful: the more you use that anchor, the more you build trust in yourself. Not just "I can calm down," but "I can take care of me." That kind of inner safety is what trauma disrupts—and what grounding helps you reclaim.

I’m calm and nurturing in sessions, occasionally playful. I may even drop a pun or two. But always, always, I want you to feel seen, respected, and invited into the healing process at a pace that feels right for you.

When Grounding Is Not Enough

Grounding is the start, not the solution. It helps you come back online, so you can engage in the deeper work. If all you do is ground, that’s okay—especially early in healing. But if you’re ready to stop going back into the same loops, it may be time to look at the underlying trauma that keeps pushing you offline in the first place.

Many of my clients are in that place. They’ve tried managing symptoms. Now they want to heal.

Let’s Find What Grounds You

Whether you’re new to therapy or looking to deepen your healing, grounding is a powerful place to begin. It can help you show up for life again—for your work, your relationships, and most importantly, for yourself.

If you're looking for LGBTQ Therapy in NYC that actually addresses the roots of trauma and helps you build lasting emotional resilience, I invite you to reach out.

Book a free 15-minute consultation to explore how we might work together. Let’s create a space where you can learn to anchor, steady, and show up fully—not just to cope, but to heal and grow.

Visit my website to schedule your free consult and learn more about my approach to Anxiety Therapy, EMDR, LGBTQ therapy, and trauma recovery in NYC.

Grounding isn’t just a skill. It’s a doorway back to yourself.