Introduction to the Series: EMDR Therapy NYC for Healing "Stuckness" from Religious Trauma

Photo by Alex Reynolds; uploaded from Unsplash on 1/13/2025.

As an LGBTQ+ therapist with extensive experience working with individuals recovering from religious trauma, I understand how deeply these experiences can shape a person’s sense of self. My goal is to offer healing and support as you journey toward reclaiming your worth and authenticity. Religious trauma can be a deeply ingrained experience, often leaving individuals feeling emotionally and psychologically "stuck." These experiences can shape how we perceive ourselves, our relationships, and the world around us. This series aims to explore different forms of "stuckness" that arise from religious trauma and how EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) therapy in NYC can play a transformative role in healing these patterns.

What is Religious Trauma?

Religious trauma refers to the emotional and psychological harm that arises from experiences within a religious context. This harm can come from rigid dogma, harsh punishment, fear-based teachings, exclusion, rejection, or even well-intentioned but misguided spiritual guidance. For many people, these experiences create deeply rooted belief systems that are hard to break free from, often manifesting as ongoing emotional challenges, harmful behavior patterns, and a sense of internal conflict.

Religious trauma can take many forms. For some, it may involve explicit abuse, such as shaming or emotional manipulation by religious leaders or community members. For others, it could be the internal conflict that arises from struggling to live up to unrealistic or rigid expectations about behavior, identity, or morality. Even teachings that are not intended to be harmful can have long-lasting impacts when they are internalized in ways that cause people to deny their own needs, desires, or even their sense of self. The pervasive nature of religious trauma means that it often touches many aspects of a person's life, influencing how they think, behave, and relate to others.

For a more in-depth exploration of what qualifies as religious trauma, you can read my previous blog post: What Qualifies as Religious Trauma? An LGBTQ+ Therapist in NYC’s Perspective. This post offers a broader look at how religious trauma can manifest, particularly for those from marginalized communities.

How Trauma Creates "Stuckness"

If you have ever felt trapped by your thoughts or found it impossible to change old patterns, you are not alone. The "stuckness" that comes from religious trauma can be incredibly challenging to overcome, but understanding how it develops is the first step towards healing.

Trauma impacts the brain's ability to process experiences fully, which can leave us feeling "stuck." When someone goes through a distressing or harmful experience, the mind can become trapped in a loop, replaying events or reinforcing harmful beliefs. Religious trauma is particularly insidious because it is often intertwined with an individual's sense of morality, belonging, and identity. As a result, the trauma creates lasting patterns of thought and behavior that feel almost impossible to escape.

This "stuckness" manifests in various ways. It might appear as a persistent belief that one is inherently flawed or unworthy, an ongoing fear of punishment or judgment, or a struggle to accept one's own thoughts and feelings. For individuals affected by religious trauma, even seemingly minor situations can trigger intense emotional responses, leading to avoidance behaviors or compulsive attempts to "fix" themselves. This cycle can be exhausting, leaving people feeling isolated, disconnected, and powerless to change their circumstances.

Another aspect of "stuckness" is the internal conflict between an individual’s authentic self and the internalized teachings or expectations of their religious background. Many people who have experienced religious trauma describe feeling as though they are constantly at war with themselves, torn between wanting to honor their true identity and fearing the consequences of stepping away from the teachings they were raised with. This creates a sense of paralysis that keeps them from moving forward and fully engaging in life.

The Role of EMDR in Healing

Imagine feeling a weight lifted as you no longer feel trapped in a constant loop of fear and doubt. EMDR helps you finally experience a sense of freedom and empowerment.

EMDR is an evidence-based therapeutic approach that helps individuals process and integrate traumatic memories. By reprocessing these experiences, clients can find a way to move beyond the emotional charge that keeps them stuck. EMDR can help deconstruct the rigid beliefs formed through religious trauma, ultimately enabling individuals to find more adaptive ways of thinking and feeling. This series will explore how EMDR helps to break down these barriers and connect clients to a more flexible, grounded, and empowered version of themselves.

EMDR works by guiding clients to focus on specific distressing memories while simultaneously engaging in bilateral stimulation, such as side-to-side eye movements or tapping. This process helps the brain reprocess these memories, reducing their emotional intensity and allowing new, more adaptive beliefs to form. For those with religious trauma, EMDR can be particularly helpful in revisiting moments where harmful beliefs took root—such as when a person was told they were sinful or unworthy—and transforming the way these memories are stored in the brain.

A key benefit of EMDR is that it doesn't require clients to relive every detail of their traumatic experiences in a traditional talk therapy format. Instead, EMDR focuses on the sensations, emotions, and beliefs connected to the trauma, which can be particularly empowering for those who may find it difficult to articulate their experiences or fear being retraumatized. Through EMDR, clients are able to reprocess these distressing events in a way that feels safer, often leading to profound shifts in how they see themselves and their place in the world.

Overview of the Series

If any of the following forms of "stuckness" resonate with you, know that you are not alone. You don’t have to navigate this journey by yourself—reach out today to begin the healing process with compassionate, specialized support.

In this series, we will be diving into seven different manifestations of "stuckness" that are common in people who have experienced religious trauma. Each blog post will explore a unique theme, including how EMDR therapy can help address the challenges associated with it and what adaptive changes can emerge as a result. Below is a quick introduction to each topic:

• Perfectionism and Self-Worth

Perfectionism often stems from rigid teachings that link moral or spiritual value to flawless behavior. This can lead to chronic self-criticism and fear of failure, with individuals feeling they must be perfect to be loved or accepted. EMDR helps loosen these deeply rooted beliefs, fostering self-compassion and acceptance of imperfection.

• Fear of Punishment

Fear of punishment is a pervasive legacy of religious trauma, with individuals often believing that every mistake could lead to severe consequences. This fear can lead to chronic anxiety and difficulty making decisions. EMDR helps to desensitize these fears, allowing individuals to experience greater safety and make choices rooted in their own values rather than fear.

• Black-and-White Thinking

Black-and-white thinking often results from trauma that teaches individuals to see the world in extremes—things are either entirely right or entirely wrong. This rigid mindset can affect relationships, career choices, and self-perception. EMDR helps to introduce nuance, allowing for greater psychological flexibility and the ability to see the gray areas in life.

• Obsessive Process and Cognitive Looping

Obsessive thoughts and cognitive looping are common responses to religious trauma, often driven by the need to avoid perceived sin or ensure purity. This exhausting cycle can be debilitating. EMDR helps individuals detach from these obsessive patterns, fostering a sense of mindful presence and acceptance of the natural flow of thoughts.

• Ethics and Moral Absolutes

Rigid adherence to moral absolutes often leaves individuals feeling restricted, as they struggle to live by rules that may no longer serve them. EMDR helps in shifting these rigid beliefs, allowing individuals to explore and define their own values, leading to a life driven by authenticity rather than obligation.

• Relationship with Authority

Religious authority figures often create lasting impressions that affect how individuals relate to authority later in life, leading to patterns of submission or rebellion. EMDR helps individuals reprocess these experiences, allowing them to assert boundaries, reclaim their personal agency, and build healthier power dynamics.

• Identity and Belonging

Religious trauma can strip individuals of their sense of identity and belonging, especially for those whose true selves are not accepted by their religious community. EMDR supports the integration of conflicting parts of the self, helping individuals embrace their full identity and find authentic belonging within themselves and supportive communities.

Take the Next Step Toward Healing

If you see yourself in any of these experiences, know that healing is possible. You don’t have to face this journey alone—professional support can make all the difference. I invite you to reach out for a consultation and explore how EMDR Therapy in NYC can help you break free from the cycles of religious trauma and move toward a more empowered, authentic life.

Contact me here for a free 15-minute phone call to discuss how we can work together to build the resilience you need to thrive. Let's embark on a path toward greater self-respect, healthier relationships, and a stronger sense of community together.

My specialties include LGBTQ+ Therapy NYC, EMDR Therapy NYC, Religious Trauma.