What Is Progressive Muscle Relaxation and How Does It Help with Tension?
Photo by Julien L; downloaded from Unsplash on 10/7/2024
Tension often finds a home in our bodies. This is especially true for LGBTQ+ individuals who face unique stressors. Living in NYC comes with its own pressures—fast-paced living, crowded spaces, and never-ending noise—and for LGBTQ+ folks, there's also the added layer of minority stress. Experiences of discrimination, trauma, and rejection can manifest as chronic tension, whether it’s in our shoulders, back, or elsewhere.
I’m Eric Hovis, a licensed mental health counselor in New York State specializing in working with LGBTQ+ adults who often experience deep interpersonal and attachment wounds. My expertise and certification includes EMDR Therapy NYC, a powerful method for helping clients process trauma and develop resilience. My practice focuses on creating an affirming, trauma-informed environment where clients can heal and grow.
Progressive Muscle Relaxation (PMR) is an effective tool for releasing this kind of physical tension, helping reduce stress, and offering some much-needed calm. This post will guide you through understanding PMR and how to use it as a part of your self-care toolkit. It's also part of a series on coping skills, so if you’re interested in more ways to manage stress, check out my posts on grounding techniques, deep breathing, bilateral stimulation, and calm place visualization.
Understanding Progressive Muscle Relaxation (PMR)
Progressive Muscle Relaxation is a simple yet powerful relaxation technique that involves tensing and then slowly releasing specific muscle groups. By intentionally tightening and relaxing different parts of your body, you create a deeper awareness of how tension and relaxation feel, ultimately helping you achieve a greater state of calm.
PMR works by targeting the physical side of stress—the tightness we carry in our muscles. When you relax your body, your mind follows suit. This technique is particularly helpful for those who struggle with chronic tension due to trauma or ongoing stress. It gives your body a pathway to release what it’s been holding onto for so long.
How PMR Helps with Tension and Stress
There’s a strong connection between muscle tension and emotional stress. Our bodies often store stress in the form of physical tightness—it might be the stiffness in your neck or the clenching of your jaw. Progressive Muscle Relaxation helps break this cycle by using the "mind-body connection" to signal to your nervous system that it’s safe to relax.
When we release tension in our muscles, we send a message to our bodies that it’s okay to let go of the stress we’ve been holding onto. For many clients undergoing EMDR Therapy NYC, PMR can be used before or during reprocessing sessions to help release body-held tension and make the experience smoother. It can also work beautifully alongside calm place visualization to enhance overall relaxation.
PMR and Trauma Recovery
For trauma survivors, including LGBTQ+ clients dealing with stress related to identity, discrimination, or family rejection, Progressive Muscle Relaxation can be especially powerful. Trauma often leaves its mark on the body in the form of chronic tension, and PMR provides a safe and gradual way to release that tension.
It can be particularly helpful before or after EMDR sessions—using PMR before can prepare your body to face challenging memories, and using it after can help return your body to a state of calm after intense processing.
Step-by-Step Guide to Practicing Progressive Muscle Relaxation
If you’re ready to give PMR a try, here’s a simple guide to get started:
Find a Comfortable Space: Make sure you’re in a quiet, comfortable space where you won’t be disturbed.
Start with Deep Breaths: Take a few deep breaths to center yourself. (For a detailed guide on breathing techniques, check out my post on deep breathing).
Begin with Your Feet: Tense the muscles in your feet, hold for 5-10 seconds, then slowly release.
Move Through the Body: Gradually move up through your body—legs, abdomen, chest, arms, shoulders, and face—tensing and releasing each muscle group.
Notice the Difference: Focus on the sensation of tension versus relaxation. Take note of how your body feels as you release each muscle.
Some practical tips: I find it especially helpful to pay attention to tension in my shoulders and forehead. Relaxing my tongue and the muscles around my eyes makes a noticeable difference. If certain body parts are sensitive or connected to anxiety or dysphoria, that’s okay—skip over them and bring kindness and compassion to yourself as you practice.
Integrating PMR into Your Self-Care Routine
PMR is most effective when it becomes a regular part of your routine. Here are some suggestions on how to incorporate it:
We can combine PMR with other coping strategies to enhance our sense of calm.
Photo by Robson Hatsukami Morgan; downloaded from Unsplash on 10/7/2024
Morning or Night: Use PMR at the start or end of your day to unwind, especially before sleep.
Combine Techniques: Pair PMR with other skills like grounding or deep breathing to deepen the relaxation response. You can learn more about grounding techniques in my post on grounding after trauma.
Stress Reminders: During high-stress periods, set reminders to practice PMR. Consistency is key—the more often you practice, the more effective it becomes in managing tension.
Common Challenges and How to Overcome Them
Like any new skill, PMR can take some getting used to. You might find it hard to stay focused or feel self-conscious about the practice. Here are some ways to overcome these challenges:
Start Small: Begin with shorter sessions—just a few muscle groups at a time.
Use Guided Audio: Practicing with guided audio can help keep you on track and make it feel more structured.
Combine with Breathing: Pair PMR with deep breathing to make it more effective and help you stay focused.
Most importantly, be patient with yourself. It takes time to feel comfortable with any new skill, and PMR is no different. Each time you practice, you’re building a greater sense of awareness and calm.
Conclusion
Progressive Muscle Relaxation is a simple yet powerful tool for releasing tension and reducing stress, especially for LGBTQ+ individuals managing anxiety or trauma. It’s practical, accessible, and can be integrated into everyday life—whether it’s part of a morning routine or a way to unwind after a difficult day. PMR can be particularly supportive when used alongside EMDR Therapy NYC, helping the body release tension before and after processing difficult material.
If you’re interested in more coping skills, explore our posts on grounding techniques, deep breathing, bilateral stimulation, and calm place visualization. Adding PMR to your toolkit can help you take another step towards resilience and healing.
Contact me here for a free 15-minute phone call to discuss how we can work together to build the resilience you need to thrive. Let's embark on a path toward greater self-respect, healthier relationships, and a stronger sense of community together.
My specialties include LGBTQ+ Therapy NYC, EMDR Therapy NYC, Religious Trauma.
